Have you ever wrapped up a presentation and just felt like something was off? Maybe you had all the right data, your facts were solid, but somehow, the audience just didn’t connect—or worse, you left the room wondering if your expertise really came through. If you’ve had that lingering doubt, you’re not alone, and in today’s episode, we’re answering the critical question: What are the invisible habits that might be secretly undermining your authority and what can you do to fix them?
Hi, I’m Tim Newman, host of the Speaking with Confidence podcast, and in this episode, I’m sharing the two biggest culprits I see sabotaging even the most brilliant communicators: a subtle vocal pattern that makes you sound like you’re asking for permission, and body language that screams nervousness instead of confidence. Instead of trying to sound perfect or change your personality, we’re getting practical with the “status reset protocol”—an actionable system you can use straight away to project authentic authority when you speak.
It’s just you and me digging deep into the mechanics of presence and authority. You’ll hear real-life examples, simple frameworks, and low-pressure exercises that you can start practicing immediately, whether you’re prepping for a big pitch or just explaining your work to a friend.
Here’s what we cover in this episode:
Why up-talking—that rising inflection at the end of statements—can subconsciously make you sound unsure, even when you’re an expert.
The hidden psychological impact of vocal patterns and how your audience’s brains interpret them.
The most common physical habits that undermine your credibility, from “T. Rex arms” to the “fig leaf” and the infamous “windmill.”
Why leaders look comfortable in their own space and how fidgeting or over-controlling your gestures actually backfires.
How to become aware of your invisible communication habits (and why recording yourself is the most powerful tool you have).
The “Punctuate, Don’t Pacify” method for transforming your vocal delivery, making sure your key points land with certainty rather than doubt.
The “Gesture with Intent” framework so your hands support your message instead of highlighting nervous energy—and how to keep movements purposeful, not robotic.
Easy, low-stakes ways to practice these new skills before you’re under pressure in a big presentation.
The status reset protocol: picking one habit to watch for this week, building awareness, and gradually building unshakable authority.
Plus, I share details about our special giveaway to celebrate the podcast’s second anniversary, including how you can win a free, three-hour one-on-one coaching package focused on communication and leadership skills.
If you’re ready to stop unintentionally asking for approval and start commanding the room as a true expert, this episode is packed with practical strategies to make that leap. As always, head to speakingwithconfidencepodcast.com for a free eBook, more resources, and info about the Formula for Public Speaking course. Remember—progress, not perfection, and your voice truly can change the world. Let’s build your confidence, one episode at a time.
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Transcript
Tim Newman [00:00:00]: The Speaking with Confidence podcast turns two in February, so one special listener will get a present. I'm excited to announce a special opportunity. I'm giving away one free, three hour, one on one coaching package that focuses on communication and leadership skills. To enter, simply listen to the Speaking with Confidence podcast and leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Then take a screenshot of your of your review and share it on LinkedIn, Facebook or Instagram. And don't forget to tag me. You have to tag me to be entered. You can earn additional entries by purchasing my new Book Connections account and leaving a review on Amazon and posting that as well. Tim Newman [00:00:44]: Again, don't forget to tag me. The Contest closes on February 16, 2026, so don't wait to take action. Implementing the insights from these podcasts can elevate your career. And who knows, you might just win that coaching package to help you further now onto the show. Welcome back to Speaking with Confidence, a podcast that helps you build the soft skills that lead to real results. Communication, storytelling, public speaking, and showing up with confidence in every conversation that counts. I'm Tim Newman, a recovering college professor turned communication coach, and I'm thrilled to guide you on your journey to becoming a powerful communicator. Did you ever finish a presentation and just know that something was off? Maybe you had the data, you knew your stuff, but the room just didn't feel like yours. Tim Newman [00:01:40]: It's not what you said, it's how you said it. There are these invisible habits that leak insecurity and they're secretly killing your authority before you even get to your main point. I see it all the time with my clients. They've done the hard work to become an expert, but their voice and their body are sending a completely different message. Today we're going to expose the two biggest culprits. A vocal pattern that makes you sound like you're asking for permission, and physical tells that scream nervousness. And more importantly, I'll give you the clear, actionable fixes to reclaim the command of the room. The first culprit is up talking. Tim Newman [00:02:21]: That's when you end a statement with a rising inflection. Like it's a question. You hear it all the time. It makes everything sound uncertain. It's technically called a high rising terminal, but the effect is simple. It tells the audience you're not sure of your own information. You're subtly asking for their validation instead of delivering your conclusion with authority. Now, why do we do this often? It comes from a good place in polite culture. Tim Newman [00:02:51]: We don't need to sound arrogant or domineering. For many young professionals, especially, uptalking feels more collaborative. But here's the psychological impact. Our brains are wired to interpret that rising tone as a signal of doubt. When you state a fact like it's a question, you're training your audience to question your expertise. They might not even realize it consciously, but the feeling, can I trust this person? Starts to creep in. Now contrast that with a declarative downward inflection, a statement that ends with a period. It sounds final. Tim Newman [00:03:31]: It sounds like you've done the thinking, and this is the result. The difference is night and day. One says, I think this might be right. What do you think? And the other says, this is correct. The fix for this isn't about changing your personality. It's a simple, mechanical shift. You need to train yourself to hear the difference and consciously land your key sentences with that deep downward inflection. It's about replacing the habit of seeking approval with the habit of making a declaration. Tim Newman [00:04:04]: This single vocal shift can project more confidence instantly because it changes your subtext of your communication from uncertain to assured. It stops you from undermining your own brilliant ideas before they even have a chance to land. Now let's talk about the second culprit, which is what your hands are doing while you're trying to sound confident. And, you know, there's a couple things I think about this always. I think about Ricky Bobby when he says, I'm not sure what to do with my hands, and I call this the hand monster. It's the fidgety, distracting, or protective movement that completely betrays your confident words. Your brain might be saying, I'm an expert, but if your hands are acting like they're under threat, that's the signal the audience receives. There are a few common culprits. Tim Newman [00:04:54]: First, there is the T. Rex, where your elbows are glued to your ribs and your hands are just floating there, making tiny, nervous gestures in a very confined space. It makes you look small and constrained. Then there is the fig leaf, where you clasp your hands low in front of your body. This is a universal, protective posture. You are literally guarding yourself. And of course, there's the windmill, where your arms are flailing about with no connection to your words, just filling the space with frantic energy. The problem with all these is the disconnect they create. Tim Newman [00:05:31]: You could be delivering the most brilliant insight, but if your hands are fidgeting, jingling keys in your pocket, or constantly adjusting your glasses, the audience's brain gets a conflicting message. The nonverbal cue of nervousness is often stronger than the verbal cue of confidence. It signals that you're not fully comfortable, that you feel like you're in a situation you need to protect yourself from. And here's the key thing about leadership presence. Leaders occupy space. They don't hide from it or apologize for it with their body language. The worst part is that when people become aware of this, they often try to exert conscious control. When, which usually makes it worse, they'll lock their hands through their sides or behind their back and they end up looking stiff and robotic. Tim Newman [00:06:21]: The goal here isn't complete stillness. That's just as bad. The goal is purposeful movement. Your gestures should have intent just like your words. They should emphasize a point, illustrate a concept, or open you up to the audience. Not just serve as an outlet for your nervous energy. So you're aware of the vocal saboteur and the physical hand monster. The question is, how do you fix them? This is where we move into the status reset protocol. Tim Newman [00:06:53]: It's a simple, actionable system to reclaim your authority. And it starts with one non negotiable first step. Awareness. You cannot fix, you cannot see. The single most effective thing you can do is record yourself. Use your phone, record a practice run of a talk, or Even just a 60 second explanation of what you do for work. I know it could be cringe worthy to watch, but it's the fastest way to see your own blind spots. You'll hear the up talking you didn't realize you did. Tim Newman [00:07:27]: You'll see the hand gestures that are sabotaging your message. And once you have that awareness, we apply two specific frameworks for your voice. It's the punctuate, don't pacify method. Instead of using a rising inflection to soften your statement and make it more palatable, use a downward inflection to punctuate it. Think of putting a firm period at the end of your key senses. Practice this deliberately. Take a simple sentence like Q3 results are strong and say it first as a question, then as a statement, such as Q3 results are strong or Q3 results are strong. Feel the difference? The downward inflection on the word strong lands with authority. Tim Newman [00:08:21]: You train this by focusing on the last word of your important points, consciously dropping your pitch for your hands. We use the gesture with intent framework. The goal is to anchor your gestures to your key points instead of letting them fill empty space. Your gestures should have a clear beginning and end that connect to a specific idea. A good practice is to keep your movements within the power zone from your sternum down to your waist. This keeps them purposeful and contained. When you're not making a specific gesture, let your hands rest naturally at your sides. It may feel awkward at first, but it reads as calm and collected to the audience. Tim Newman [00:09:05]: The key here is to stop thinking about your hands and start thinking about your message. Let the gestures serve the message, not your nerves. The best way to implement this is to start low stakes conversations. Practice the punctuate method on a phone call with a friend. Work on the Gesture with intent framework when you're explaining something to a colleague. This builds the muscle memory without the high pressure of a big presentation. The Status Reset protocol isn't about a complete personality overhaul. It's about identifying these two major leagues of authority and plugging them with deliberate practice techniques. Tim Newman [00:09:45]: When you control the vocal slide and the physical tell, you fundamentally change the signal you're sending from approval seeker to room owner. And when you fix these habits, the change isn't just about you, it's about how your message is received. Your content suddenly lands with the way it deserves. The compound effect of vocal authority and physical calm creates an undeniable presence. It's not about being perfect, it's about eliminating the major distractions so people can finally focus on your brilliant ideas for one week. Pick one habit to watch for. That awareness is the first step for the complete system to build unshakable confidence. That's what my Formula for Public Speaking provides. Tim Newman [00:10:32]: Subscribe for more practical strategies. That's all for today. Remember, we're looking for progress, not perfection. Be sure to visit speakingwithconfidencepodcast.com to get your free eBook, the Top 21 Challenges for Public Speakers and How to Overcome Them. You can also register for the Formula for Public Speaking course. Always remember, your voice has the power to change the world. We'll talk to you next time. Take care. Tim Newman [00:11:00]: I hope you enjoyed today's show. And don't forget to enter the contest. Remember, I'm giving away one free three hour, one on one coaching package that focuses on communication and leadership skills. All you have to do to enter is listen to the Speaking with Confidence podcast and leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Then take a screenshot of your of your review and share it on LinkedIn, Facebook, or Instagram. And remember, don't forget to tag me. You're not entered unless you tag me and you can earn additional entries by purchasing my new book Connections that Count and leaving a review on Amazon and posting that as well. Remember, the Contest closes on February 16, 2026 so don't wait to take action. Tim Newman [00:11:43]: Implementing the insights from these podcasts can elevate your career. And who knows, you might just win that coaching package to help you even further. We'll talk to you next time. Take care.