Escaping Burnout: Unlocking Confidence and Fulfillment in Your Career with Danielle Droitsch

Tim Newman [00:00:00]:
Welcome back to Speaking with Confidence, the podcast that helps you build the soft skills that lead to real results. Communication, storytelling, public speaking, and showing up with confidence in every conversation that counts. I’m Tim Newman, a recovering college professor during communication coach, and I’m thrilled to guide you on your journey to becoming a powerful communicator. Today’s guest is Danielle Droitsch. She’s an executive and leadership coach, empowering high achieving professionals to discover their superpowers, love their work, lead confidently, and achieve the well being they deserve. She believes it’s possible to love your career, yet many remain disengaged. Nine years ago, as a senior leader at a nonprofit, Danielle experienced burnout.

Tim Newman [00:00:53]:
Overcoming this transformed her approach to work. Since then, she has helped hundreds regain confidence in their careers. Often misled by myths about career success, her mission is to help people uncover their secret sauce to feeling successful and energized at work. Danielle develops strategic plans with clients to transform careers into fulfilling, purposeful experiences while prioritizing well being. Danielle, welcome to the show. I’m really excited for this conversation with you today.

Danielle Droitsch [00:01:22]:
Me too, Tim. Thank you so much for having me.

Tim Newman [00:01:24]:
Oh, no worries. You know, we have a, a lot in common. A lot in common. You know, we, we were both in our careers for, for a long time and you know, at some point we both felt just completely unfulfilled professionally. What was that like for you and how did you, how do you figure it out to get where you are today?

Danielle Droitsch [00:01:47]:
Yeah, so it’s really a good question to ask, like, what was I feeling? Because it was now almost a decade ago. I mean, it was going on for a couple years. I mean, I finally pulled the trigger and did some things 10 years ago. It probably started 15 years ago. And I found myself constantly looking for like, what should I be doing? Like, it was more just I was in a search zone and I was going to work every day. But I, and, and it wasn’t that my. Had a terrible job. In fact, I mean, the job was just fine.

Danielle Droitsch [00:02:25]:
It was, I was feeling something was missing. That’s the best way to describe it. Something was missing for me and I didn’t know what it was. I just knew that sometimes I was really bored at work. Sometimes I got really irritable with the very, very small things. I was feeling impatient. There’s just all these little sort of emotional indicators. But I kept thinking, well, maybe I just should make a change, some sort of career change.

Danielle Droitsch [00:02:56]:
Which ultimately I did. But I had no idea what that change should be. So I just Kept researching and researching, kind of going down endless Google search paths. And eventually I figured it out, but that’s kind of how I was feeling for a couple years, at least.

Tim Newman [00:03:15]:
Yeah, there’s so many common themes there. And I felt really kind of the same ways. And my wife kept saying, well, what is it that you want to do? What is it that you want to do? And, well, I don’t know, because our lives get so wrapped up in. In our jobs, and that becomes who we are, and that’s really. And the reality is that’s not who we are, it’s what we do.

Danielle Droitsch [00:03:37]:
Yes. Oh, you just said the right thing. Yes.

Tim Newman [00:03:40]:
We spent so much time there, we. And it was like, you know, for me, she kept saying, what do you want to do? What do you want to do? I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know. And, you know, I tried a lot of things, and I got a lot of new hobbies, a lot of things that I really enjoy now. Doing podcasting is actually one of them. And obviously that’s become part of. Part of my new career.

Tim Newman [00:04:01]:
But finding that thing that really inspired me to get back to what it was when I first started my career. It wasn’t easy, and it did take. It took me about five years.

Danielle Droitsch [00:04:16]:
For whatever reason, you’re not alone. It takes when people start to feel something’s missing or something’s not right or, you know, there’s lots of different ways, a lot of different words or phrases people use, but. And sometimes we start with focusing on the. Like, it’s my boss, it’s my job, you know, like. Like, we externalize it. But then you kind of eventually figure out, wait, I kind of fixed that thing, and it still didn’t get better, whatever it is. So you start to realize that it’s something about you. It’s nothing wrong with you, but it’s simply.

Danielle Droitsch [00:04:51]:
It’s within you. The answer is within you. And hearing you talk a little bit about your Tim makes me realize, you know, at the end of the day, it. Sure. What we do every day does matter. I mean, that’s kind of what our lives are. But it’s not who you are. Your job is not who you are.

Danielle Droitsch [00:05:11]:
So it really begins with this question. Who are you? Who are you? Yeah. And that’s a tough question.

Tim Newman [00:05:18]:
It is. And as we get into this, I really kind of hope that, you know, we can help, you know, the younger generations figure this out a lot sooner. Not that we didn’t have it figured out, but it took so long for us to make that change or make that adjustment. And not that we should make snap decisions, but you know, five years is a long time to be unhappy.

Danielle Droitsch [00:05:41]:
Yeah.

Tim Newman [00:05:42]:
Or to be unfulfilled, especially when we’re doing. When this part of our life takes up so much of our life, you know.

Danielle Droitsch [00:05:48]:
Yeah.

Tim Newman [00:05:50]:
You know, in our pre call, you know, you told me the story about how the first time that you said that you, somebody told you that somebody else told you that you were extraordinary at something. And to me that was such a powerful story. Can you share that? Because I think, I think that’s really the essence of what I think our listeners really need to hear.

Danielle Droitsch [00:06:10]:
Yeah. I’m not sure what my story was. Maybe give me a.

Tim Newman [00:06:13]:
It was, you know, you were, you were good at being a lawyer. You were good at doing your, your, your previous career, previous profession, but nobody ever told you you were extraordinary until you became.

Danielle Droitsch [00:06:27]:
Yes, yes, yes, yes. So, yeah, so I’ve been trained as an environmental lawyer. So, you know, working on the protection of environment and have been doing that in the policy space and the legal space for many decades. And I’d always had looked at myself as good at it, you know, maybe really good. But you know, the accolades I didn’t really get sort of, wow, you’re amazing at this. Like, never heard that. But I did get sort of, you know, I kept getting promotions and I kept getting, you know, there would be other accolades, other measures of success, like I might get published somewhere, invited to a conference. So that’s sort of how I was sort of rolling for a really long time.

Danielle Droitsch [00:07:12]:
But I never heard these words. And then, you know, fast forward through my entire transition and I became, you know, executive coach and where I’m coaching leaders and professionals to sort of help them be successful in their roles. And that’s in a one to one setting. It’s not in front of a whole bunch of people. It’s just really asking powerful questions and helping people sort of discover for themselves what, what the answer is for them. And I had done my training, but I was receiving from my clients these reactions of just like, you know, effusive, like, wow, you’re so good at what you do. And they were being, they were, you know, through a coaching session would have these like big, you know, aha’s. And you know, I can’t believe I figured this out and thank you so much for your help and.

Danielle Droitsch [00:08:06]:
But I was getting those again and again and I was like, I really never got that feedback as a lawyer. You know, maybe I’d get a pat on the back or good job on that presentation, but never this sort of. So it kind of made me realize that like, you know, it took me a little while to kind of figure this all out, that I had been doing what I was good at, but not where I was strong. And that’s a big thing I do with my own clients today, is helping people figure out where they’re strong. Which is, goes back to that question you and I just talked about. Like, who are you? For me, who I am is, it’s not. I’m a coach. I mean, yes, I do coach.

Danielle Droitsch [00:08:47]:
Coaching is part of what I do. You’re a podcaster, you know, it’s part of what you do. But who I am is someone who helps other people reach their full potential. I help them become like the strongest possible humans and do gooders and high impact people that they can be. And coaching is a means to get to doing that. But I did not identify myself as someone who helps someone else reach their full potential until really in the last 10 years of my career. And I would never have told you that that’s what I was going to do with my career.

Tim Newman [00:09:22]:
Right. And it’s, it’s my guess is that that’s who you are outside of coaching. You help people. You help people in whatever aspect or situation that you’re in. That’s, that’s what you do. Because that’s, that’s kind of what what coaching is. It’s kind of what we do all the time anyway in this profession. I think in education, being college professor or what have you, that’s what we do is we help people.

Tim Newman [00:09:51]:
And if, if we could, if we could figure out how to get younger professionals, the younger generation to figure out who they are and what about them makes them, what is their special sauce, what is their superpower? Early yes. How much better would their, would their life be both personally and professionally?

Danielle Droitsch [00:10:14]:
Oh, you just, yeah, just. Such an important question today. You know, today, April 30th, when we actually are recording this, a major study came out from the Gallup Corporation. But also it’s not really from the, it’s from a whole bunch of universities together, but it was on. It’s one of the largest studies on human flourishing. This idea of flourishing. Flourishing isn’t the same thing as happiness. It’s flourishing.

Danielle Droitsch [00:10:39]:
Flourishing is really the aspect of doing well in multiple areas of your life. And the study came out and one of the more interesting findings from the study is that young people age 18 to 29 are sinking in terms of human flourishing, it’s a sort of a new aspect of the study. And there’s of course, lots of theories about why that is. But our young people, you know, typically when you’re young, I mean the old studies or the prior studies, the young people were high, you know, they were flourishing. And then there’d be a sink in their 20s and 30s and maybe 40s, and then it would go back up in your 50s. And this is just a typical sort of you.

Tim Newman [00:11:26]:
Right.

Danielle Droitsch [00:11:27]:
But unfortunately what they’re seeing is that that’s actually dissipating to an extent. And so young people, when they should be flourishing, are not flourishing.

Tim Newman [00:11:39]:
That’s really interesting because I didn’t expect that at all. Especially when we look at well being. That’s really what you do is well being of the whole person. Up until about maybe five or ten years ago, well being just really meant our physical well being. Yes. Now, you know, it’s, it’s really kind of expanded into our emotional and, and mental well being, which I think is, is great and long overdue. And I think we need more resources and, and, and help in, in that area. But when you look at it from what you just said, these, the, the younger generation, they have so much more than, than we ever unhappy or unfulfilled.

Tim Newman [00:12:28]:
That to me is just, it’s like a gut punch. Because, because, I mean, when you, when you describe that, you know, to me, it’s, it’s a normal life cycle, right? You, you’re young, you have a good time, you, you, you get into your career, you get married, you have kids, and, and life becomes life, right?

Danielle Droitsch [00:12:45]:
Yeah.

Tim Newman [00:12:46]:
And then your kids figure it out a bit, your kids get older and then, you know, you’re, you’re on to the, to the second or third phase of your life. That’s just kind of what happens. What are your thoughts on that? I mean.

Danielle Droitsch [00:13:00]:
Well, let’s, let’s. I mean, let’s start with what well being is. And you, you were hitting on elements that it, the, the well being is sort of a multifaceted picture. And so it’s important to kind of really ground ourselves. Well, being is at its core and I feeling well in your life, it’s a little different than happiness, although connected. So feeling well in multiple areas of your life. So what does that look like? It is feeling well in your relationships, it is feeling well in your work, it is feeling well in your financial state, is feeling well physically. It is feeling well mentally.

Danielle Droitsch [00:13:41]:
It is feeling well in terms of your connection to Your community. So, so you can almost imagine a whole bunch of spokes around a wheel. And you don’t have to necessarily be feeling well in all aspects, but you need to be feeling well in multiple aspects. So we are often putting a lot of energy and attention into career. I work with career stuff all the time. But I always caution my clients, yes, it’s great to feel well at work. We want to, we spend a lot of time there. But if you’re just focused on that to the detriment of everything else, then you are probably not going to have a high level of well being because you have ignored the other pieces.

Danielle Droitsch [00:14:23]:
So we want to do is we want to think, okay, how is my mental well being? How is my relationships? Like my friendships, my family connections? What about my community? Am I connected to my community? Am I feeling well in that space? What about my finances? Like, do I feel well there? And we go through that process of understanding and, you know, and then we sort of, you know, start to reflect. Oh, okay, maybe I need to focus on a couple of areas and bring those up. And when you bring up, like, let’s say you are feeling well in two areas, but you’re not feeling well in four areas and you focus on those two of those other four areas, you can actually bring your overall well being up substantially because you are like looking at multiple spokes. So it’s not really about getting one of the spokes really strong. It’s about trying to get as many, but maybe not all, but as many spokes on that wheel, you know, to be strong. But the problem is, is that I wonder if we are, you know, encouraging our kids to focus a little bit too much in one area. For example, there is a lot of pressure on kids with respect to grades and, you know, their scores. And there’s a lot of pressure on kids, young people in particular, on the career.

Danielle Droitsch [00:15:51]:
And you know, I get it, like, it’s not, I don’t think it’s as easy for younger people to find work today as it was when I, you know, this is 30 some years ago that I was looking for my first job. But that said, you know, housing prices have gone up. There’s lots of different factors that are driving this. You know, it’s really hard to just, you know, pay your rent. And yet this very, very serious focus on career and good jobs and well paying jobs I think has taken away from the other spokes on the wheel. Another factor is being disconnected because, you know, we are so connected to phones and our, you know, we are we do connect. I mean, people are connected. But, you know, the well being, scientists would say sitting on your phone and connecting with someone on a phone through maybe chatting, the texting or whatever is not the same connection as sitting down and having, you know, going for a walk or sitting down and having a coffee.

Danielle Droitsch [00:16:58]:
And so we’ve become this very virtual society. And of course, Covid didn’t make it any easier. But if we take the time to step back and look at those different areas and nurture those, and I’m talking to young people, but I’m talking to everyone here, then this feeling, this feeling of like being disconnected and happy or not flourishing or whatever it may be, you actually have a pretty, pretty strong impact or influence on your overall well being, more so than you know. But it is about sort of pushing the lever and actually taking action in those spaces. And it may not look like how you’ve been living your life. So that’s a little bit of the introduction to what it means to invest in human flourishing.

Tim Newman [00:17:45]:
Yeah, it’s. You talk about connection. It’s funny that we’re disconnected even though we are so connected. Yes, I know, it’s like an oxymoron. I read a study recently for a podcast that I’m getting ready to do about the chemicals that are released in our brain working. When we, when we get a text message, where we get that bing or whatever it is, when. What happens when you’re talking to somebody and their phone goes off and they stop listening and they focus on the phone and what they’re saying is that that has kind of changed our chemistry. The, the chemical that’s released in our brains, when that happens, it’s the same chemical as feeling pain.

Danielle Droitsch [00:18:46]:
Feeling pain?

Tim Newman [00:18:47]:
Yeah, feeling pain. So like, if I’m talking, if you’re talking to me and I all of a sudden get a text message and I stop and I look, stop listening and look at that. You get the chemical reaction of pain.

Danielle Droitsch [00:19:01]:
Oh, and then you might get that little.

Tim Newman [00:19:04]:
And I get. And I get. Yeah, exactly. And it’s, it’s, it’s funny how that works and how, how it’s actually come to that, you know. You know, when we grew up, if we didn’t pay attention to somebody listening, that was considered rude.

Danielle Droitsch [00:19:22]:
Rude.

Tim Newman [00:19:23]:
And now it’s just accepted and we just move on. And you know, I think when, when you look at well being and you look at health, how this, how this really wraps into the idea of confidence and powerful communication. How can we have confidence if we don’t have some of those other things. If we’re only feeling good in maybe one or two areas, how can we have confidence to be able to go out and communicate? If we’re so worried about our finances, if we’re so worried about our careers, if we’re so worried about other things, we’re so. We can’t actually even open ourselves up to having good interactions and communication.

Danielle Droitsch [00:20:05]:
Yeah, yeah. So many. I mean, so much rich material and everything you just said. I mean, I would just gonna start with the human connection piece and in fact, some of the researchers who are analyzing this study’s output from revealing the. That young people are not flourishing in the way they have in the past theorized that it was because while we’re connected more than ever, we’re really disconnected. And so if there’s one thing that we could do to start to flourish more as human beings. And yes, I agree, Tim, it is connected to confidence. And I’ll get to that.

Danielle Droitsch [00:20:49]:
It would be to. To turn off the phone, put the phone away, and spend time with other human beings that you love and you admire and you care about. I’m not talking about any human being. Pick the people you want to be with and spend real time with them away from the phone. I just got back. I’m based in Utah, in Salt Lake City. But our family spends a lot of time in southern Utah exploring the amazing desert forest landscapes. Beautiful.

Danielle Droitsch [00:21:25]:
And we had four days and three nights in a very remote part of southern Utah that a lot of people don’t hit. But it’s called Capitol Reef National Park. It’s one of the parks. And we just got a cabin. And it was just me and my husband and my daughter. And I did turn off my phone and my computer and just. We went hiking every day and just found little things to do. And it was unbelievable what that three days or that four days and three nights did for my.

Danielle Droitsch [00:21:56]:
For my psyche, for my mental wellness, for my health and for my family and for my connection. I obviously can’t do that all the time, but I just hit me how crucial it is that I get off my phone, I get off my computer, get off my email, and be present with my family. And this is true for just about anyone else. And I would say that if we were to do more of that, your wellbeing will go up in a way that you couldn’t possibly predict. It’s not the only thing you can do, but it’s probably a game changer when it comes to someone who feels like they’re not flourishing in Life.

Tim Newman [00:22:39]:
You’re absolutely right. How was your daughter with turning the phone off?

Danielle Droitsch [00:22:43]:
Well, we have this sort of rule that’s off. I mean, it’s off. I mean, well, you know, we didn’t. In the evenings, we let her have a little bit in the. In the evenings at the hotel room. But when we’re out in the environment, when we’re hiking, that’s. It’s. You know, it’s a.

Danielle Droitsch [00:23:01]:
It’s a. It’s a rule. And she understands that. And the interesting thing, and this is probably true for many people, initially, you might feel a little uncomfortable, right? You’re like, ooh, I don’t know. Can I really step away? But then I watched this transformation where she basically starts to embrace the outdoors. She starts to discover things. And I see the kid that, you know, truly is what a real kid does is like, discover the environment. But it’s true for all of us.

Danielle Droitsch [00:23:29]:
It doesn’t have to be just kids. You know, I know we live in a society now where kids and all of us are connected. I mean, there are some people have chosen not to be, but I’d say the vast majority, kids included, have iPads and phones and so on and so forth. But if we can learn how to unplug and connect with other people or even connect with something we love to do, like read a book or do a hike, it doesn’t always have to be with other people, but it’s really about getting back to your sort of core self, like what actually you enjoy. You start to actually come home. You’re like, coming home to who you are as a person, and then other things start to open up. Because if you are, I’m not saying you’re going to hit the peak of flourishing, but let’s say you move your flourishing from, you know, a five to a seven or an eight, let’s say I’m just giving a ranking. Guess what happens.

Danielle Droitsch [00:24:24]:
You start to feel better, and you start to show up more as your authentic self, and you are seen as more confident. You feel more confident because you are taking action to actually invest in yourselves. And I think right now, just in general, there’s just a lot of people chasing after whatever they’re chasing after. Yeah, they’re just chasing. And they haven’t stopped to just take a breath and say, who am I? And who you are is you without a phone. First and foremost, it’s you without technology. And so. And the big thing I’ve learned about parenting, but also coaching, is that every single person’s different.

Danielle Droitsch [00:25:06]:
So just because when I go into, you know, the desert of Southern Utah and go hiking, I feel like myself, that may not be someone else. Someone else. It might be going to a play in New York City. For someone else, it is sitting on a beach with a book. For someone else, it’s, you know, maybe even, you know, going to a conference and meeting a whole bunch of people. And this is where it is about, like, really trying to figure out who you are. The only real question you need to know is, what makes me feel energized?

Tim Newman [00:25:37]:
Right.

Danielle Droitsch [00:25:38]:
What brings me energy? Because that’s really the clue to your superpowers. But first, you have to get off your phone. You have to stop chasing after, you know, whatever you’re chasing after and just give yourself some space and growth to, like, reconnect. And I’ll tell you, and I’ll shut up here in a second, but when I was going through my, like, crisis of who I am, I spent a lot of time going out there and volunteering and helping, and I was just really in a frenzied, oh, my gosh, I need to reassess everything. But it wasn’t until I got became really quiet with myself and became sort of stopped working so hard that I was able to discover the coaching. So sometimes you have to relax and you have to kind of, like, calm down, rest a little bit, and what is meant for you will come your way. But we probably have to have a deliberate plan to bring things down a few notches in order to allow that next chapter to open up for us.

Tim Newman [00:26:40]:
Yeah, but I think that’s so true, really, in a lot of the big decisions and major things that go on in life, whether it’s searching for a job, whether it’s trying to find a college, whether it’s trying to find a significant other, if you stop forcing those things and start being you. And like you said, take that step back and just let things kind of happen and play out intentionally. Right. I’m not saying just sit around, do nothing, but do things intentionally. That’s when things start coming to you.

Danielle Droitsch [00:27:14]:
Yeah.

Tim Newman [00:27:16]:
My youngest daughter just changed jobs about two months ago, and she was looking for, like, six months. I said, it’ll happen. And once it happens, what you’re going to find is you’re going to get two or three offers, like, in succession. And she mumbled, you don’t know. I said, okay, but that’s what happened. She ended up getting three offers within a week, and it was like, wow, now she has choices. You don’t have to take the first job, you don’t have to. It’s all for just because you don’t like the other one.

Tim Newman [00:27:48]:
You know, you can sit back and relax and truly think about it and do what’s best for you and your family.

Danielle Droitsch [00:27:57]:
Yeah. It’s such a good example, though, what happened to your daughter. Because I’ve seen it with clients even, and whether it’s looking for a job or I need to figure out what comes next, or I feel lost and I don’t know what I’m doing with my life, you know, whatever it is, when you’re in that space of chasing after something, or you feel scarcity or you feel worried, or you’re just, you’re not in a good space, you’re not in a good headspace over the thing that you’re going for. It’s almost the worst thing to do, to keep chasing. And that’s what happened with me. Like, I spent all my time, like I was in a bit of a crap crisis of confidence over who I was, but I had no idea what I was going to do next. And, you know, I, I did a lot of things looking, I, I, I definitely agree with you when you said, don’t just sit back and do nothing, because that doesn’t do anything.

Tim Newman [00:28:47]:
Right.

Danielle Droitsch [00:28:47]:
You need to act. But, but in terms of your mental capacity, it’s not about chasing after something. It’s really about relaxing into believing and trusting that it will come your way, but you need to be intentional. And so, you know, when I became intentional and thoughtful and relaxed and sort of stepped back, then, you know, eventually what happened was the coaching program came across my desk and I looked at it and I said, I don’t know why, but I think there’s something about this coaching program that’s for me. And I was just listening to my sort of inner voice saying, maybe you should sign up or, let’s take a look at this course. Course. And I’ve had other clients do this to me too. Like, where they’re like, this thing came across my plate and I’m really curious about it.

Danielle Droitsch [00:29:34]:
Like, maybe I should look at it. And I always say, yes, if your curiosity is piqued. Curiosity is often your intuition speaking to you. Not always, but many times it’s your intuition saying, this is something to follow. And then you just, without worrying, without grasping, without, you know, chasing, you open, you explore it, and the next thing you know, you might have three job offers. But, you know, it’s, it’s a little bit of an energy shift that’s sort of a Pre. A prerequisite to kind of figure. It really is a prerequisite to confidence.

Danielle Droitsch [00:30:11]:
Because confidence doesn’t come from chasing and scarcity and any of that. It really, I mean, I was at the top of my career when I went into this sort of crisis that I am mentioning. I had no confidence at that point. I had no confidence. And it wasn’t going to just be created from working even harder at the current job. I had. The confidence came from aligning myself with more of who I was. And that turned out to be someone who helps other people reach their full potential.

Danielle Droitsch [00:30:46]:
Now I feel so confident in that space. And so I sort of aligned myself and my daily. My work, my life, my purpose, my, even my spirituality is all connected back to this idea of helping other people reach their full potential. And coaching is one way I do that.

Tim Newman [00:31:08]:
And I think it’s also important for people to understand that that can also change throughout our life too. Our core values don’t really change. Yeah, who we are doesn’t change. But how that comes across and how that’s expressed and how that actually plays out in relationships and work product and those other types of things that go on in life can and do change.

Danielle Droitsch [00:31:37]:
And probably should change.

Tim Newman [00:31:39]:
You’re right.

Danielle Droitsch [00:31:39]:
I mean, if you’re doing the same thing over and over and over again year after year, it probably gets boring after a while. Now maybe you change it up in a different way, but even my father, who was a federal government employee for 35 years, you know, my parents, it was staying the same job forever, ever and ever. That’s not the way it is now, but it was for our, you know, grandparents, my parents and grandparents and so on. But he was always changing things up all the time within his job. He’d find new projects and more new things. And the reason is because you can’t do the same thing over and over again. Our brains aren’t even built for it necessarily. So we, we.

Danielle Droitsch [00:32:19]:
So it can be a job change. It can be how you deploy. I work with a lot of mid to senior level professionals who are sort of hit that wall, the same wall I hit.

Tim Newman [00:32:29]:
Right.

Danielle Droitsch [00:32:29]:
And they are all playing with things. Like, they’re not so much playing with, like, what should my career trajectory be like? I mean, they are wondering about their careers, but they’re thinking more about purpose and impact. They’re like, where can I make the best impact in the world? And so sometimes it’s speaking, sometimes it’s podcasting, sometimes it’s blogging, sometimes it’s a career shift. But they’re really interested in, like, how do I leave a legacy that I can feel really proud of? And I’m not saying the young people need to worry about that now, but you can begin the journey by asking, who am I? And where can I really best create the best results? And the reason we want to care about that, even when you’re starting your career, is that people notice you. They feel that impact from you. You get your confidence from. I mean, I could go on and on from, not from your skill set, but from, from the, you know, sort of this idea of superpowers, like people. That’s what, that’s where you start to feel really energized, is how you deploy your skills and the impact you leave.

Danielle Droitsch [00:33:39]:
If that makes any sense.

Tim Newman [00:33:41]:
Yeah, it makes, it makes a ton of sense. I call it your innards. I mean, it’s your innards. It’s, it’s, it’s you. You could. You actually feel it inside of you. I mean, you. At least I do.

Tim Newman [00:33:51]:
I mean, you, you feel what you, you feel that confidence, you feel that strength. You, you feel that, that, that passion, that emotion. And then it comes out in, in the way that you want it to, as opposed to not feeling it. And, and it comes out as, as anger, as frustration, as disappointment or whatever that is.

Danielle Droitsch [00:34:15]:
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And figuring out this idea of who you are is really a tricky business because, you know, we are from the very young age. You know, we go to school, we learn skills, skills, we learn knowledge, and then we go to college maybe, and we’re doing the same thing. And so it’s all about acquisition from outside yourself, like, what can this professor teach me? What can this program teach me? And we get very focused on that. And I’m not saying it doesn’t matter, because I read job descriptions every day and I know what the job market’s looking for. And they want people who know Microsoft Excel and they want people who have certain capabilities. But the deployment of having knowledge and skill is not really the secret sauce of confidence and strengths. It’s really found in how you deploy a skill, how you show up in the workplace.

Danielle Droitsch [00:35:14]:
So you may have the knowledge of, let’s say, project management, you may be a project manager, and you’re really good at organizing information and data and sequencing and timelines, and you’ve been trained, and so you know all this stuff. But the secret sauce is probably found in your unique talent that comes to it. And so for one person, it might be, you’re a really great problem solver as you’re pursuing a project management plan, or it might be you’re extremely good at figuring out who should be doing what, because you’re good at sort of figuring out how talent should be allocated. Or you’re just really good at communicating. You’re so good at keeping everybody informed about what the project is, why it’s why it matters, and why everybody should stick to their timelines. And you’re pretty good at managing people who don’t want to be managed. So those are all these what we call soft skills that get deployed as you’re deployed. The skill of project management is still there, sort of maybe your core foundation.

Danielle Droitsch [00:36:22]:
But the stuff people notice is not in that skill deployment. It’s found in these really special ways that you show up in terms of how you deploy it. That’s really the secret sauce. So if you’re just like a robot mechanically deploying a skill, people probably won’t notice you, and you probably won’t feel that confident in yourself. But if you start to notice, oh, you know, I’m pretty good at actually bringing a team together and making them feel great about, you know, their progress, then pay attention to that.

Tim Newman [00:36:53]:
Right?

Danielle Droitsch [00:36:54]:
That is really the stuff that. That a where you feel strong. But guess what? It’s what you can lean into to build confidence in how you show up in the workplace. The problem is we often don’t pay any attention to these things. We call them soft skills and we think they’re unimportant. But once you pay attention to them, I promise you, that’s where your confidence starts to grow.

Tim Newman [00:37:16]:
You’re exactly right. And getting back to what you said earlier, from the education system perspective, so much focus is on grades and test scores, and we never, ever truly talk about soft skills, which to me is obviously, this is what we do. That’s where we’re failing our students and our young people. And maybe that’s why they’re scoring so low on that study you referenced. Because if you can’t communicate your thoughts and your feelings and your knowledge, it doesn’t matter what you think, feel, or know.

Danielle Droitsch [00:38:01]:
Yeah, yeah, I agree. We’ve done a disservice. I mean, certainly you see Gallup and the strength finder assessments, and you start to see them in certain companies or in certain universities. But we are mostly sending kids out there thinking that all that really matters are your skills and knowledge and probably the hard skills. You know, we’re really kind of focused on that, and that’s perhaps driven by economic needs, you know, cost of housing. We need to have I need to make this much money to pay my massive college bills back. Like, I’m aware that, you know, there’s a dynamic there, Right. That has kids feeling a certain pressure.

Danielle Droitsch [00:38:41]:
And I get it, and I’m, I’m not trying to discount it. And yet, sure, they might make a lot of money and pay back their college, you know, loans and buy the condo and they have all that, but guess what? They may not feel happy. Right.

Tim Newman [00:38:59]:
Right.

Danielle Droitsch [00:39:00]:
So, you know, maybe. And that. And that’s when people come my way. They’re like, yeah, I have all the stuff. Stuff. Like I, I got this great job. I have six figures. I’m doing all these things.

Danielle Droitsch [00:39:09]:
And I just didn’t think that I would be so unhappy at work. And so young people have the ability early on to see all this before others, you know, have the little added advantage. And it doesn’t mean you don’t focus on security and stability, but as you’re doing it, you are really, really, really aware of your, your superpowers. You’re super aware of how you’re strong, the additional value bring. You figure out who you are, your secret sauce. You have leaned into them in such a way that you build some confidence in yourself. You’re connecting with people. They know you, you know yourself.

Danielle Droitsch [00:39:51]:
And what happens is that, guess what, those people grow and they get advanced and they get moved up pretty quickly because those are the managers, those are the leaders. Those are the people that actually end up, you know, getting the promotions. So there’s value in doing it, but it does take a little extra work, and sometimes it’s not something that you’re going to find in a classroom.

Tim Newman [00:40:14]:
Yeah, I would say very, very rarely. Some of that stuff you’ll find in the classroom, I think, you know, you, you may be able to find, you know, the, the how to figure those things out, maybe. But ultimately, that’s all self work. That’s all. I mean, you’ve got to put the work in, into it. You’ve got to, it’s. It to me goes back to the innards. You’ve got.

Tim Newman [00:40:37]:
You’ve got to want to be able to figure that those things out sooner rather than later. Because again, like you said, when you have some of those things figured out, you carry yourself differently. You look different, you’re, you sound different, you’re. You’re viewed differently.

Danielle Droitsch [00:40:54]:
Yep.

Tim Newman [00:40:56]:
And that’s one of the reasons why also people are noticing in advance because they show up different.

Danielle Droitsch [00:41:04]:
That’s right. That’s right.

Tim Newman [00:41:07]:
Danielle, thank you so much. Where can people find you to work with you.

Danielle Droitsch [00:41:12]:
So yeah, so I am at time four wellbeing and four is the number four. So timeforwellbeing.com and you can find me on my website. You can also find me on LinkedIn. I love connecting with everyone. Anyone on LinkedIn. I have a free training that I’ll be sharing through you, Tim, but basically it’s a training on how to find fulfilling work. What does it really look like? So we’ll have that link to you as well.

Tim Newman [00:41:47]:
Awesome. And I’ll put those links in the show notes for everybody.

Danielle Droitsch [00:41:50]:
Thank you so much, Daniel.

Tim Newman [00:41:52]:
Again, thank you so much for spending some time with us today. I really do appreciate it. Lots of great stuff. And I’m hopeful that not just young professionals, but people in general really get into that work and figuring out who they are because it’s life changing, both personally and professionally.

Danielle Droitsch [00:42:14]:
100%. You just nailed it. Thanks so much, Tim. I’m so happy to have talked to you today.

Tim Newman [00:42:19]:
All right, take care. Be sure to visit speakingwithconfidencepodcast.com to get your free eBook, the Top 21 Challenges for Public Speakers and How to Overcome Them. You can also register for the Forming for Public Speaking course. Always remember, your voice has the power to change the world. We’ll talk to you next time. Take care, Sam.